“The Tollbooth” opened this week, an independent film starring Tovah Feldshuh. And while it is garnering mixed reviews, the film promotes one particular stereotype that demands our attention. Like so many movies these days there is an underlying storyline about a Jew becoming romantically involved with a non-Jew. In the case of “The Tollbooth,” it is a reaction to and rejection of the Jewish family values that are portrayed in the film. It is what we call an “intentional” intermarriage. But it just ain’t so. Most of the time, the majority of the time, Jews meet non-Jews — at school, in the workplace, in social environments — fall in love and get married. It is as simple as that. Nothing less, nothing more. Jews aren’t necessarily “marrying out” any more than non-Jews are “marrying in.” These days, choosing ones spouse does not require a choice between entering or leaving a community. It is time to once again change the prevailing notion before it becomes another urban myth.
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