Birthright Israel has provided thousands of Jewish young adults with a powerful, if not exhausting first experience in Israel. Many of the participants board their El Al flight to Israel with some inkling of what they can expect over the 10 day trip: time at the Western Wall in Jerusalem, a dip in the Dead Sea, an early morning trek up Masada, and a “nudge,” or push, by trip organizers and leaders to find that special, Jewish someone.
Matt Lyons, an adult child of intermarriage, recently returned from his birthright Israel trip. In a piece that he wrote for Interfaith Family.com, he describes not only his personal connection with Israel, but explains why he agrees only in part with the trip organizer’s in-marriage “nudge.” Yes, Matt whole-heartedly sees the importance in someday raising Jewish children to not only support Israel but also to support Judaism, its people and history. However, he doesn’t necessarily agree that the only way to do this is to marry someone Jewish.
“…the obligation to pass along my Judaism does not require me to marry someone Jewish. I am surely evidence of that, as were the other young Jews on my trip from interfaith families. The Taglit-Birthright trip, at the same time, strengthened both my desire to raise my children Jewish and my belief that a loving, honest and open-minded interfaith marriage can help me accomplish it.”
Matt’s statement, which we couldn’t have said any better ourselves, is an important reminder to the community that intermarriage is not necessarily a problem or an ending, but it can be used as an opportunity for engagement. Here at JOI, we work with and offer support for many interfaith families who share in Matt’s views on interfaith marriage and raising Jewish children. To do so, we have developed programs like The Mothers Circle and The Grandparents Circle which are designed to help engage families and strengthen the Jewish community. We hope through programs like these and through adult children of intermarriage like Matt, the community will open its eyes to the interfaith families who make Jewish choices.